Question by LV: Friend upset I cannot be a “free daycare” anymore..long sorry.?
One of my friends lost her job and was out of work for a month. When it was time for her to go back to work, she did not have the money for daycare. I am a stay at home mom with three little ones of my own, all under the age of 4. She asked if I could care for them until she was able to pay for childcare. I told her I could do it for a couple of months until she got back on her feet. It was late June when I started caring for them. They are now 28 months and 15 months. I do not charge her anything for caring for them and she has never offered either. It has been almost seven months that I have been caring for them. I do not mind, but the issue is that she works 5 am-1:30 pm. She drops them off here around 4:15 in the morning. My other half works 2 pm-11 pm M-F. He has not gotten enough sleep since they started coming here. They are not the kids that will sit and just watch a movie that early in the morning. They are bouncing off the walls. My kids are not getting their sleep either being woken up at 4 in the morning and it is really taking a toll on me, my little ones and most of all my fiancee. He gets up angry and wants to leave the house right away. He says that he should not have to suffer anymore because she does not want to pay daycare. A month or so was not a problem and he too thought we should help her out, but he says she is taking advantage of us and needs to find childcare at this point. I agreed. I told her last week that “Stan” (my fiancee) and myself would appreciate if she could find someone in the next few weeks, that I could watch them until she did, but that it is really starting to take a toll on our relationship and my kids are just not getting their sleep they need (mine are 9 months, 24 months and 3 1/2). She pretty much did not say anthing other than she would find someone and has given me the complete cold shoulder since. Not even saying hello or goodbye when she comes, won’t talk to me and even told one of my friends I was just selfish. She told her that my husband makes a ton of money so I would never understand. I am just annoyed. We have cared for them for seven months. I cannot leave the house durring the day, our sleep is completely interupted and my house is in shambles until they go home and I can clean up. I feel that she is being completely out of line. Should I say something to her about her comments or just let it go. Again, this is a friend of mine that I used to be really close with when I was younger, but we are just friends now. Not family or anything like that. What do you think?

Best answer:

Answer by juliecandoo
She is taking advantage of you and when you tell her you cannot do it anymore you will lose the friendship and she will take advantage of someone else. This is her way not yours, don’t feel gulity, her kids will be fine, something tells me she has alsways made her problems other peoples problems and this is how she will always be Sorry Sweetie, don’t feel bad, You family needs you more than hers

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