VERY Irritated. Natural childbirth/pain meds/induction?
BySo, I just got off the phone with a good friend of mine. Who happens to be a mother. Now, she went to the regular OB, had an induction, and and epidural. I don’t fault her for that at all…whatever that’s normal, yes?
But me? I believe that birth is natural. Biblically, a pregnancy lasts 10 lunar months (295 days). Well, now it’s been shortened to 40 weeks (280 days). Well, to me, if you aren’t past 295 days, there is no reason to be induced. TO ME. I also think that if you can handle (or think you can) the pain, why use pain meds?? From everything I have heard, it CAN make you groggy, cause you to not clearly remember the birth, and also can affect the baby. I know there are those on both sides of the topic. But I’d rather not take the risk.
Personally, I want to try for my birth to be as natural as possible. I understand that I may go into labor and think “Omg, I was an idiot.” and ask for and epidural the minute I get to the hospital.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I respect each person’s decision for their birth. Do what is right for you. But there is a reason I have a midwife (Birth is natural, intervention isn’t.) and that is because I want to try for natural.
I don’t come down on you for having an epidural, an induction, and having your child the way YOU wanted to. So, why make fun of me, or act like I’m a fool for wanting to?
Idk. Perhaps I’m being hormonal and over-reacting to the situation. After all, the whole subject was based on the fact of my due date being Christmas Eve and her assumption that I would be induced a week earlier. I told her, as I will tell the midwife/doctor/whoever that tries to make me, “I don’t want to be induced. This baby will come when it is ready.” I don’t HAVE to agree to being induced just because a doc or midwife doesn’t want to come in on Christmas. Guess what? That’s what they get paid for!!! Ugh!
Okay…So, If you actually read all that, the point is…have you had a situation like this? Where your birth plan was either called into question (not by a medical professional) or mocked?? How did you handle it?
18 weeks 5 days.
As always, no rude comments/answers. I do report. 
Oh now don’t get me wrong, if there is a MEDICAL reason to be induced, okay. But to be induced because of the timing of my DUE DATE? H*LL NO!!!! And I know it’s painful. I’m not dumb. But…I’ve got a high tolerance for pain due to extordinarily painful periods for YEARS. I went to school hurtin so bad I could barely walk. But…I think if I can handle that, I can TRY to go natural.
Also, I’m not saying that if something comes up and I can’t do it, that I’m going to be a stubborn a$$ about it. I know that if my midwife looks and me and goes, um…we NEED to induce you because of this or that…okay. Or, if I can’t handle the pain, or labor for so long I can no longer take it, okay. I’m flexible. I just WANT these things. It’s why it’s called a birth plan. It’s not in stone. LOL!!
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9 Comments
February 27th, 2010 at 10:16 pm
ahh yes i asked for no meds..the nurses looked at me like i was nuts. Of course when i told them the baby was coming out they also looked at me like i was nuts…but i proved them all wrong and i must say they were quite amazed that i didnt even make a sound. WHILE THE LADY IN THE NEXT ROOM WAS VERY LOUD AND NOT EVEN IN LABOR LOL=)
GOOD FOR YOU HUN.. I BELIEVE I GOT TO ENJOY ALL ASPECTS OF BIRTH.
February 27th, 2010 at 10:26 pm
i dont mock people who have natural birth, home birth, etc. my mother had me naturally. actually most of our mothers had us naturally i would think..i dont think that epidurals were that popular back then…but i may be wrong. I was induced at 38 weeks and had an epidural. it was also my choice. brody would have been about 10 pounds if he was born on his “due date” and they thought i would have to have a c section. he was almost 8 pounds 2 weeks early. my labor was great, only 6 hours long and i pushed for 15 minutes. brody was fine, i was fine. everyone birth their own way, some women want pain meds, some dont. its a personal choice.
February 27th, 2010 at 11:05 pm
There is a girl that I work with who talks down to me about my parenting skills because I had an epidural and she didn’t. I had a nine pound baby and she had a five pound baby. Anyway I usually just ignore her and smile and nod.
As long as your mid-wife is certified and you trust her enough to give deliver your child I see nothing wrong with it. You did mention going to the hospital though which I applaud because natural birth or not there may be complication that cannot be handled at home and the hospital is the safest place for you. Especially if you plan not to be induced because bigger babies mean bigger problems. My daughter was 11 days late and almost didn’t make it through the birth canal.
Either way good luck to you and your family!
February 27th, 2010 at 11:57 pm
With my last delivery I chose a midwife with a goal of a natural birth without interventions (which I achieved). And yes, family and friends asked if I was crazy and asking when I would be induced (I delivered only 5 days late).
Honestly, I don’t give a rip what other people’s thoughts about my birth plan were. I used it as an educational opportunity to let them know my reasons why, and left it at that. I didn’t let it get to me.
Not sure who is making fun of you or mocking you or whatever, but if that’s the case, then I’d wonder why they are your friends at all. Good luck.
February 28th, 2010 at 12:55 am
Ok, so here’s the deal, you have the right to feel any way you want, but do know that child birth is painful! I thought I could deal, since I have a high pain tolerance, but not so much as I thought. When you get to the hospital, if it is natural as you want and not induced, then if the pain is too much for you to bear it may be too late to get an epidural at that point. Obviously it is your choice. Please do be warned though, that many hospitals have a lot of liability surrounding the birth of a child. If they(doctor) feels that you are putting the baby at risk, they will refuse to treat you, because of liability. For example, if they need to induce you for reasons of high blood pressure, medical problems, baby heart rate, etc, any number of reasons and you refuse, because you want to wait the full 10 months, there can and probably will be serious reprocussions. Just take into consideration that you have every right to feel the way you want, but when it comes to babies, the doctor’s will know what is best in MOST cases. You are right in the sense that you know your body and you really have the final say. Just a note I know someone who works at a hospital in mother baby, and they just had a woman that refused to do a c section, and they had taken her baby away from her, because she was putting the baby at risk because of her belief. Good luck, having a baby is wonderful, I hope that it is a wonderful experience for you.
February 28th, 2010 at 1:05 am
Please don’t take this the wrong way, but a lunar month is 28 days. 10 lunar months = 280 days, so pregnancy hasn’t actually been shortened at all by calling it 40 weeks.
As far as pain meds go, I’m actually on the same boat as you here. Everyone I talk to (with the exception of my mom) thinks I’m crazy because I don’t want an epidural. The most I want is the intravenous pain killers, but only if the pain is too much on it’s own. I’m going to take a birth class and learn breathing techniques to help me get through it. At my first visit my doctor automatically assumed I would be getting the epidural, and at the hospital I deliver at, more than 70% of the women get epidurals. I hate that when you voice your opinion on the subject to people they automatically look at you like you’re nuts, and then proceed to tell you that you won’t be able to handle the pain. Honestly, the reason I don’t want the epidural is the needle. Needles freak me out and I don’t want/need that kind of stress during the delivery. Just thinking about it makes my back hurt and my stomach turn.
So I think you should stand your ground. Don’t let anyone push the pain meds or the induction on you.
February 28th, 2010 at 2:02 am
I wanted to have a natural birth with my first also… I ended up having an epidural. I was in labor for 46 hours (got the epidural for the last 6). Just to clarify… i was totally aware of EVERYTHING that was going on. I was able to push easily (only took me 20 mins) and I had no side effects, grogginess or pain afterwards. But I am truly inspired by women who are able to do it naturally. I’m hoping to go natural for my second. I totally understand your point of view… but you have to also keep in mind that things happen and you may change your mind for any number of reasons. Don’t be ashamed if you do. The birth is actually not what makes you a woman or a mother… it is actually being there and loving your child that does.
Good luck. You have lots of time.
February 28th, 2010 at 2:49 am
ive seen both sides of this.. i think that you should stick to your guns.. do what is right for you!!
personally i don’t like hearing ppl wanting to get induced so they can be present for their fathers, brothers, best friends wedding etc etc.. or when ppl at 37 weeks drink castor oil to try bring on labour when they are so close to the end anyway…..
at the same time thought, whilst i want to try go without pain meds, im not making hard and fast rules for the day… if labour goes for ages, then ill have an epidural so i can get some sleep so that i can be as alert as possible for the first moments my baby arrives.. i’ll try natural, but i won’t punish myself or think any less of myself if i end up needing a little extra support from the drugs
February 28th, 2010 at 3:24 am
Having worked in OB for 12 years, I’m quite familiar with birth plans. I will say this: the parents that bring one in that’s a standard template from a website, where they’ve simply checked off a box or filled in a blank usually end up with an epidural, augmentation of labor with pitocin, delivering on her back, legs in stirrups/calf supports, and an episiotomy. Or a c-section for failure to progress.
We (the staff) generally know these people have heard about “getting a birth plan” as the thing to do, so they jump on the internet, google birth plans and print off something that still has “enema” and “perineal shave” on it as routine things to decline. They have no intention of wanting and working towards a natural birth and we know it. While we would never say anything negative to them, it’s apparent they’re just following a trend.
Now, the mom that has educated and empowered herself on what is routinely done and what she does and doesn’t want and comes in with a custom birth plan she and her hubby/partner have written has a great chance of the birth she envisions. These moms usually have a doula and ask for the birth ball and the labor tub to be set up in their room upon arrival. These are the patients I love to work with. They know what they are capable of and will work to get it done.
You sound like you are making an informed decision about your labor and your baby’s birth and I hope that you have a nurse who will not only honor your decisions, but work with you in attaining your goal of a drug-free birth. You might look into getting a doula to assist you in labor and be an advocate for you in the unfortunate case you get a nurse that is less than supportive. Best wishes!