How do you feel about letting babies just “cry it out”? ?
ByQuestion by jazzy_gurl123: How do you feel about letting babies just “cry it out”? ?
Everyone says if you have done everything you can think of and the little one is still crying or fussy, to just let them lay there and cry it out.
Do you agree? Disagree?
BTW my son is 4 weeks..
He has a dry diaper, he ate but is refusing the bottle now, I’ve been cuddling him, I’ve gave him gas drops, took his temp, made sure he didn’t have any diaper rash, and yes I’m a first time mom, I don’t like letting my son CIO, it makes me feel so upset & it makes me feel like I fail as a mother, my bf believes in him CIO…
Best answer:
Answer by Kindest Girl In the World
let them cry until they get tired
then they sleep and you relax
Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!
Related posts:
17 Comments
February 7th, 2012 at 11:28 am
not a good idea.because they will become very angry person when they are older. they may be wet or hungry. not a good idea.
February 7th, 2012 at 11:36 am
I say it is sometimes necessary to lay them in a crib, in a room by them-self and let them throw their tantrum and scream for 10 minutes or so as this actually can help develope their lungs, and plus sometimes babies just need to cry. Then go pick him up and feed him and he will fall out asleep immediately afterwords. I do not say let him scream and cry for an hour straight as that is just cruel, but for 10-15 minutes is healthy.
February 7th, 2012 at 11:57 am
I never let my baby cry more than 20 minutes at the very most. You have to think, they are 100% dependent on you. They absolutely cannot do anything for themselves and if they can sit there and cry that long, something is obviously wrong. Even if you can’t figure it out, I would at least hold him and comfort him the best that you can. Plus,there is an article that says it damages parts of their brain.
February 7th, 2012 at 12:20 pm
Absolutely disagree. Carry him around in a sling or something, he needs you.
February 7th, 2012 at 12:37 pm
Sometimes you have to. If you’ve fed, burped, changed, cuddled, and comforted and your baby refuses to be soothed, then yeah, it’s best for everyone if you just let him cry and do your best to ignore it or just step outside for a few minutes to give yourself a break.
February 7th, 2012 at 1:16 pm
I agree and disagree. I think it’s important for a baby to learn to self-soothe so that they will be independent. However, if you’ve tried everything and he’s still crying and refuses to wind down then he’s wanting something.
February 7th, 2012 at 1:43 pm
Not a good idea because there’s always a reason when a baby cries. Maybe he’s uncomfortable or cold, or hot etc etc…
February 7th, 2012 at 2:21 pm
For a 4 week old? Absolutely not. That’s just lazy. A baby that young needs to be held, it’s an actual need, like food and shelter.
Now, there are lots of different CIO methods. Some people just leave baby to cry until they pass out from exhaustion, which I think is just plain wrong no matter baby’s age, and others do it for short periods then go in and soothe baby. I do occasionally let my son cry for 2-3 minutes just b/c he doesn’t want to be soothed to sleep, but never for an extended period.
If baby is excessivly fussy, my suggestion is to get a good baby wrap/carrier and “wear” baby during his fussy times. The feeling of being next to you will be soothing and you will still have free hands to do almost anything.
EDIT: Try walking around or taking him outside for a change of scenery. If the weather is cold, bundle him up, stick him in a stroller and walk around the block.
February 7th, 2012 at 3:08 pm
if all their needs have been met ,including cuddle time,letting them cry is not a bad thing,i wouldn’t let my babies go for more than 5-10 min.
February 7th, 2012 at 3:26 pm
“Everyone” does not say that you should lat a baby down and let them cry. There is not one healthy thing about letting a baby cry. It raises their blood pressure and heart rate and releases stress hormones into their body. It does not develop a baby’s lungs any more than bleeding develops a baby’s veins.
Take a look at parentingScience.com or Dr. Sears’ website for information on letting a baby cry. Harvey Karp has a book “The Happiest Baby on the Block” which will help you with ideas for calming a baby.
February 7th, 2012 at 4:01 pm
We have never let our son cry it out. Babies cry for a reason even if that reason is just need to be hugged. We have always been able to figure out the need and get him happy very quickly. He cries very little.
How would you like it if something was really wrong and someone could help you but just said, “good luck with that.” They are babies and to just let them cry and not help them is cruel to me.
**EDIT** Another thing that works is a change of scenery. Take him/her for a walk. We use a carrier sometimes and a stroller. He loves it.
February 7th, 2012 at 4:13 pm
Letting a 4 week old cry it out is nothing short of neglect. Even the CIO ”experts” don’t say you should leave a newborn scream! Goodness, that’s awful. Getting their stress levels up this young is a major risk factor for SIDs and we still don’t know the full extent of the emotional damage it can do in the long run. They’re fed? Dry? Warm? Cool, you’ve taken care of their physical needs. Don’t their emotional needs matter at all? I am actually sick to my stomach that anyone could think a 4 week old baby was manipulating anybody and should just be let cry. Ugh.
February 7th, 2012 at 4:57 pm
Not everyone. Only those who have done zero research on the subject will tell you that letting a baby CIO is a good thing.
Even those who do recommend the method will say that a baby of 4 weeks is way too young.
Like someone else said, being held and comforted is a NEED at this age. The whole thing about them being fed, changed, burped and they are fine is an absolutely ridiculous statement.
ETA: “just let him cry and do your best to ignore it” That comment makes my stomach ill. If I heard this comment about a 3yo throwing a temper tantrum is would be appropriate but in regards to a baby, it’s sick.
February 7th, 2012 at 5:08 pm
”Everyone says if you have done everything you can think of and the little one is still crying or fussy, to just let them lay there and cry it out. ”
Who’s ‘everyone’? Sorry to hear that everyone around your little baby is sadistic and lacks any sort of empathy for a tiny little gorgeous baby who’s been shoved out into a scary cold world.
Your bf believes this is okay? Tell your bf to think of it this way:
Do you know any elderly people? A grandmother? A neighbour? An old person who is COMPLETELY DEPENDANT on the people around him or her? What if they were crying? What if they were SCREAMING and BEGGING for someone to come and comfort them? They’re scared, they can’t do anything for themselves, they no longer understand the world around them. They’re upset. Their breathing is getting faster. Their blood pressure is rising. Their body is being flooded with stress hormones. They need somebody to come help them. Do you say ”no you annoying freak, we fed you and changed you, now SHUT UP and don’t bother me. Your emotions mean NOTHING to me. I DON’T CARE.” and then leave them in their room screaming? I doubt it.
So don’t do that to an innocent little baby, either.
February 7th, 2012 at 6:01 pm
I don’t believe in letting a baby just cry it out alone in his crib. It’s cruel, especially for a newborn. The cry it out “method” is actually a sleep training method designed for much older babies with serious sleep problems. It was never intended for newborns and general crying. The problem is that way too many parents latched on to it and used it as an excuse for lazy parenting. Instead of comforting their baby, they let him cry and call it a “method”.
Your “job” as a mother to a newborn is to comfort your baby in anyways necessary. Sometimes that means just holding your baby while he’s crying and rocking him. Letting a baby cry alone can be emotionally and mentally damaging, but holding your baby while he cries isn’t. That means the house may look like crap, and that dinner is late, and less “goof-off” time; but the results of a well-adjusted child is totally worth it.
Another thing to remember, 4-8 weeks is the fussiest times for babies and he will grow out of it. It is possible your baby has colic and that is the reason why he’s crying. When your baby cries “for no reason”, remember that your job is to be there for him and to comfort him even when he’s crying-not to make the crying stop.
February 7th, 2012 at 6:29 pm
Absolutely not! We have two children and have never supported CIO. You know when your child is tired or not feeling well by their cry. A few moments but never 10-whatever minutes by themselves. We have a good relationship with our kids now because of, I belive, this practice.
February 7th, 2012 at 6:33 pm
i do believe in cio but only after mabee 6 months of age.
4 weeks is a little too young to be left crying, there will be something that you baby wants, its hsis way of communicationg and the only way at that age.
possible tummy ache? things that you cant see, give him a good winding session make sure ALL the burps are up, my son used to get tummy ache and i could tell as he would pull his knees upto his tummy and scream. sounds silly but the only thing that would calm him was constant movement, i would walk round the house with him on my shoulder patting his back.
something will calm your baby you just need to try things out. its hard being a first time mum as your learning. just try different things. i would also sometimes hold his bottom in one hand and head in the other and bounce him up and down very gently and he would stop crying immediatly because it would soothe him.
done let him cry it out at such a young age
xxx