what do you think about the cry it out method?

It works. But: the child has known only a warm cozy feeling since she became able to sense her environment. Now that she is outside the womb things are not the same. She has issues with not being comforted. Remember, during her 9 months of development she became aware of your voice, your body heat and the comforting surroundings of your body. Now, outside, she misses them.

My son was accustomed to loud cars and loud music from before being born. After being born he would ALWAYS sleep in the car with the radio playing. As soon as the car and the music stopped he would wake up.

While the CRY IT OUT method will work, it works at a cost. My son had no problem sleeping when a radio was placed by his crib. It reminded him of his first known world of comfort, and eased his transition WITHOUT being picked up all the time OR being left to cry mercilessly.

They grow up and out of phases. Being a parent means being patient with changes and learning. Find something you ALWAYS did while carrying her in the womb and try that. It’s possible she may respond quite well.

My favorite thing as a toddler was the wall heater. The warm air surrounding me reminded me of when I was on the inside. I’d stand in front of it every time it came on. I even fell over falling asleep on my feet a few times. To this day warm blowing air is comforting.

Feed her real food before she goes to bed each night. She will sleep all night long.

i have lerned thru babysitting, that u can listen to a lil kid cry for hours, and not to worry. What u need to do is give your girl a baby blanket, nice, soft, and prob pink. Next, wrap it over a heating pad, one of those nice, herbal rmedies ones should work fine. Then, you stick it in the microwave on a paperplate for like, 30 secs, thn, u rewrapit in the blanket and give it to her.

It is just as important for her to learn to comfort herself. You don’t want her to have to depend on others for comfort when she’s older, if you know what I mean. She needs it ingrained early that she will be fine by herself.
She’ll be fine, and after a good cry, man will she sleep!
I promise, it won’t take long and she’ll figure out that mom’s not falling for the fits anymore and she’ll just start going to sleep when you put her down.

I think it works better than the “suck it up” method.

I know it’s hard, but I had to do it with my son- at about that age, and now I’m going to have to do it with my daughter who it 8 months. It really sucks to do it to the poor angels, but they are creatures of habit an habits are HARD to break. Just continue to be there, but don’t pick her up. Tell her to go to sleep and leave the room, come back in 5 min, then 10 min, gradually go longer and longer, unless the reassurance makes her scream worse. Oh- take the crib sheet and sleep with it, then put it on her crib matress- that way your scent might reassure her.

I would say that, as long as YOU have the time to let her fall asleep in your arms, then you’re fine.

However, you should be prepared for a day when you don’t have the time. At some point, she will need to learn how to fall asleep on her own.

When I had to do this with my daughter, the first night it took about 30 minutes, with me reassuring her after 10 minutes, so that she knew I would come if she needed me. The second night, it took 20 minutes. The third night, it took about 5 minutes.

It definitely was a gut wrencher, but it needed to be done, and it only took a few nights for us to get into the habit of her falling asleep on her own.

You might try a variation on the theme. Instead of letting her cry, perhaps you could have her fall asleep on your bed, while you’re sitting next to her rubbing her back, or cuddling with her. Then move her to the crib after she’s asleep. Something like this could let her get used to falling asleep without being in your arms, and could be a first step to falling asleep by herself.

hun, that has to be the hardest question to answer. i have 3 kids so i pretty much know what you’re going thru. my suggestion is try not to listen to everyone around you that has so much “knowledge”. you do what is best for your baby. i believe there is a rhythm to everything in life, and if your baby wants to be in your arms don’t deprive her be proud she feels safe with you. there will come a time when you will see that she is “playing” you. trust me, i’ve been played 3 times…….
good luck

I could never do that with my son, he still sleeps with me and my husband and he;’s 16 months but It doesnt bother either of us. but also my son would throw up if I let him cry to much.

It is important that your child learn to soothe herself to sleep. You aren’t the only one who jumps every time your child cried out – I have two kids and did it with both!

Most important thing is to establish a routine… bath, feed, read books into bed or whatever works for you…

I went through the exact thing with my son and then a little bit with my daughter. I do not completely believe in the “scream it out” method like many suggested to me I like a more gentle approach.

It’s so hard giving up rocking the baby to sleep I know I sure loved that time with my children but in the end it is better for them and you that they put themselves to sleep. Your daughter should be awake but drowsy when you place her in the crib pat her on the back a couple of times say goodnight and walk away. If she starts to cry you can shhh her a bit and see what she does. If she continues to cry rub her back (pat bottom, stroke hair, rub foot whatever works for you child). If she gets up and fights gently lay her back down without saying a word and continue to rub her back. When I first started this with both my kids they would get back up and yell and scream but I was just held fast to what I was trying to accomplish and got through it. After a couple times my kids would then go to bed if I was rubbing their backs. Then I moved to not rubbing but just placing my hand one their backs. Again this in sighted a bit of rioting but I held fast and we got through it. All the while I would not talk just shhhhhhhh them gently. So next I moved to just sitting by the crib and then by the door then on the out side of the door. Sometimes when I was sitting outside the door or by the door I would have to say, “lay your head on your pillow and go night night, mommy is here.” But I didn’t do this often because it would tend to wake them up because they would want to be with me. There will be a lot of tears shed by your child but they are not “real” tears your child is fine she is just mad. You are there with her and both of you will get through it.

My doctor had always said to me to not go in the room to not turn on the lights just to check on them and lay them back down but with my kids that just didn’t work. My kids would be up and screaming so I amended what he said and added in some other things I had read about. Hope it all works out for you. GOOD LUCK!

If you have been jumping at every whimper (I know I sure did) then you will more than likely have to let your son learn to soothe himself and you may want to try my approach to do this. The most important thing is you need to be consistent; you can’t start out trying to have her put herself to sleep and then when it gets to hard pick her up. It will send her mixed messages and in the end it will be harder on the both of you.

I did this with my son at 9 months and my daughter at 7.

If I was unclear with anything or if you are interested in my method please feel free to email me!

I’m a mum of a 2 year old and i was never strong enough to do it to my son. Although i am a single mum and i didn’t have someone there to support me while he was screaming. I know that it works because my sister in law did it with my nephew but i just couldn’t do it.

have you tried putting her in her car seat and putting on the dryer or washing in spin cycle

This is called the Ferber Method. It is important for a baby to learn to self-quiet. YES, it will be tough at first, but the key to this method is CONCISTENCY. If you choose to do it, you have to stick with it or it will not work. Ask you pedeatrician for some small steps to take before you try a new bedtime routine.

I dont like leaving my child there to cry it out either… But there does come a point i think when they need to learn your not going to pick them up everytime they cry. I started out by putting her in her crib and letting her cry for 5-10 min then i would go in and hold her and let her know i was there. Then put her back in for another 5-10 min. I would never let her cry more then 15 min. I think thats just mean. Cause they dont really understand especially if they are used to you running everytime they cry. Try warm lavender baths right before bed. If my daughter is really fussy i rub lavender lotion on her feet and she goes right to sleep. Good Luck!

I think making them cry it out at any age is borderline child abuse!!! A couple minutes here and there when you have to get something done is one thing, but it is natural for babies to want their mom at the end of the day to rock them to sleep. Don’t listen to what other people tell you, you may have a hundred people telling you how to raise your baby. You’re doing fine the way you’ve been doing it.