Comments on: Whats your opinion on the cry it out method? http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method Resources for the new and expectant mother. Sat, 11 Feb 2012 00:00:16 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: EFF! http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method/comment-page-1#comment-4080 EFF! Mon, 01 Feb 2010 21:17:48 +0000 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method#comment-4080 it really is just a matter of personal choice. hopefully the parents choice meshes well with what will best benefit he baby and their personality...i think usually it does. usually that is the case but i think often parents that have problems with their kids are fine parents, just have a different teaching style than the kids learning style. the crying out method is perfectly fine and NOT harmful, as long as its done with the right intentions and not just being lazy. obviously you don't let a 4 month old "cry it out" thats way too young, they probably do always cry for a reasonable need as opposed to older babies that DO happen to cry just to be picked up. and there should be limitations on how long the child is allowed to cry it out for and to what point. if you pay attention instead of just turning up the volume you can tell when the baby is actually crying because they need you and when they are only crying because they don't want to go to sleep. some parents and babies find it better to cuddle and be rocked and there is nothing wrong with that too. i don't think it will cause spoiling any more than crying it out will cause trauma. its just a different method and sometimes it works better that way. i'd like to think i do a little bit of both. i did let my son cry it out at 8 months when i put him in his own crib...it took two days and less than 20 minutes of crying each night and he slept on his own every night with out crying...it was magical. lol so it worked for us, but i think we did it at just the right time and we were all ready for the change. i don't think letting any baby cry for hours every night at bed time for months is okay, not even weeks. thats excessive...but a little crying isn't going to hurt a baby...honestly... it really is just a matter of personal choice. hopefully the parents choice meshes well with what will best benefit he baby and their personality…i think usually it does. usually that is the case but i think often parents that have problems with their kids are fine parents, just have a different teaching style than the kids learning style.
the crying out method is perfectly fine and NOT harmful, as long as its done with the right intentions and not just being lazy. obviously you don’t let a 4 month old “cry it out” thats way too young, they probably do always cry for a reasonable need as opposed to older babies that DO happen to cry just to be picked up. and there should be limitations on how long the child is allowed to cry it out for and to what point. if you pay attention instead of just turning up the volume you can tell when the baby is actually crying because they need you and when they are only crying because they don’t want to go to sleep.
some parents and babies find it better to cuddle and be rocked and there is nothing wrong with that too. i don’t think it will cause spoiling any more than crying it out will cause trauma. its just a different method and sometimes it works better that way. i’d like to think i do a little bit of both.
i did let my son cry it out at 8 months when i put him in his own crib…it took two days and less than 20 minutes of crying each night and he slept on his own every night with out crying…it was magical. lol so it worked for us, but i think we did it at just the right time and we were all ready for the change. i don’t think letting any baby cry for hours every night at bed time for months is okay, not even weeks. thats excessive…but a little crying isn’t going to hurt a baby…honestly…

]]> By: Damiens Mommy <3 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method/comment-page-1#comment-4079 Damiens Mommy <3 Mon, 01 Feb 2010 21:08:29 +0000 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method#comment-4079 I could never let my baby cry it out...When they cry it for a reason...they need to know that you will respond so they can depend on you..My bub sleeps in bed with my and my hubby..it works best for us because he sleeps a lot better and i love to cuddle the lil guy ♥ I could never let my baby cry it out…When they cry it for a reason…they need to know that you will respond so they can depend on you..My bub sleeps in bed with my and my hubby..it works best for us because he sleeps a lot better and i love to cuddle the lil guy ♥

]]> By: Aggie H http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method/comment-page-1#comment-4078 Aggie H Mon, 01 Feb 2010 20:19:12 +0000 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method#comment-4078 This is what I did with my daughter. I started a routine of bath, bottle, then bed. i put her to bed drowsy but not asleep. For the first 2 weeks she would cry herself to sleep. I would go in her room if she cried more than 15 min. and pat her on the back for a minute then leave the room. The first three nights really sucked, but after that she started going to sleep within 10 min. She is 8 months now and I lay her down at 8pm every night and she goes to sleep on her own with no fussing. It was a struggle at first but it really paid off in the long run. Everyone is getting the sleep they need. This is what I did with my daughter. I started a routine of bath, bottle, then bed. i put her to bed drowsy but not asleep. For the first 2 weeks she would cry herself to sleep. I would go in her room if she cried more than 15 min. and pat her on the back for a minute then leave the room. The first three nights really sucked, but after that she started going to sleep within 10 min. She is 8 months now and I lay her down at 8pm every night and she goes to sleep on her own with no fussing. It was a struggle at first but it really paid off in the long run. Everyone is getting the sleep they need.

]]> By: Preplicious <3 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method/comment-page-1#comment-4077 Preplicious <3 Mon, 01 Feb 2010 20:09:18 +0000 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method#comment-4077 I am 14, but my mom does NOT believe in the CIO method for babies. If the triplets (4 months) cry, she gets them. If the 4 year olds cry, she will let them cry it out after she makes sure they are safe and not hurt in anyway. For example if they just don't want to take a nap. I am 14, but my mom does NOT believe in the CIO method for babies. If the triplets (4 months) cry, she gets them. If the 4 year olds cry, she will let them cry it out after she makes sure they are safe and not hurt in anyway. For example if they just don’t want to take a nap.

]]> By: linedancer563 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method/comment-page-1#comment-4076 linedancer563 Mon, 01 Feb 2010 19:54:56 +0000 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method#comment-4076 "If your baby is not wanting to go to sleep do you pick him/her up and try something else or let baby have a good cry" If she doesn't want to go to sleep, then I just wait another 30 minutes and try again. My daughter is 20 months old and has *never* cried herself to sleep. And never will. There is no such thing as a "good cry." There are different cries, sure. Cries for hunger, cries for cuddles, cries for sleep..etc. But, there is no such thing as a "learn to self-sooth cry." Any parent who says that their infant needs to learn to self-sooth needs to take a step back and see how horribly ridiculous that sounds. I understand all babies and parents are different, but this is one topic I just can't support. There's already evidence it causes harm, but still parents say "I ferberized" like it' something to be proud of..Trust me, it's not. So, to answer your question (LOL) I would try anything and everything to settle my tired child down. But I would never let her cry. ETA: What is with all the "It depends on how old the baby is." I'm sorry, but letting a toddler cry it out is just as bad as letting a newborn. Sometimes worse, in my opinion, because unlike a newborn, an innocent toddler *knows* mommy is in the other room, and just chooses not to come. And that is a very sad thing. “If your baby is not wanting to go to sleep do you pick him/her up and try something else or let baby have a good cry”

If she doesn’t want to go to sleep, then I just wait another 30 minutes and try again. My daughter is 20 months old and has *never* cried herself to sleep. And never will.
There is no such thing as a “good cry.” There are different cries, sure. Cries for hunger, cries for cuddles, cries for sleep..etc. But, there is no such thing as a “learn to self-sooth cry.” Any parent who says that their infant needs to learn to self-sooth needs to take a step back and see how horribly ridiculous that sounds.

I understand all babies and parents are different, but this is one topic I just can’t support. There’s already evidence it causes harm, but still parents say “I ferberized” like it’ something to be proud of..Trust me, it’s not.

So, to answer your question (LOL) I would try anything and everything to settle my tired child down. But I would never let her cry.

ETA: What is with all the “It depends on how old the baby is.” I’m sorry, but letting a toddler cry it out is just as bad as letting a newborn. Sometimes worse, in my opinion, because unlike a newborn, an innocent toddler *knows* mommy is in the other room, and just chooses not to come. And that is a very sad thing.

]]> By: xalice.blackx http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method/comment-page-1#comment-4075 xalice.blackx Mon, 01 Feb 2010 19:50:35 +0000 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method#comment-4075 If you are looking for a way to get your baby to sleep with out the cryig I have found that establishing a routine, putting on jammies, listening to the same mellow album etc. my daughter starts falling asleep almost as soon as I put the album on. I disagree with ferberizing, but children also need to soothe themselves a routine is another way of helping them feel secure without having to sleep with them forever. I also got my daughter used to waking up with out me first. If you are looking for a way to get your baby to sleep with out the cryig I have found that establishing a routine, putting on jammies, listening to the same mellow album etc. my daughter starts falling asleep almost as soon as I put the album on. I disagree with ferberizing, but children also need to soothe themselves a routine is another way of helping them feel secure without having to sleep with them forever. I also got my daughter used to waking up with out me first.

]]> By: Mommy♥ http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method/comment-page-1#comment-4074 Mommy♥ Mon, 01 Feb 2010 19:05:56 +0000 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method#comment-4074 I, personally, would NEVER be able to leave my Daughter to "cry it out". When she's crying, I want her to know that I will be there to comfort her. I want her to know that she doesn't have to worry about Mommy not coming. To me, her cry means "Mommy, I really need you to hold me now", if I left her to cry, I would feel like I'm failing her, in a sense. Even if she doesn't need to eat, doesn't need a diaper change, doesn't need to burp, or anything of the like... I will hold her close, talk to her, sing to her, etc. just to let her know that I'm there. The only time I "agree" with the CIO method is if you're at your wits-end and feel like you would do something irrational if you heard your baby cry anymore. Just long enough to take a few deep breaths and relax. I, personally, would NEVER be able to leave my Daughter to “cry it out”. When she’s crying, I want her to know that I will be there to comfort her. I want her to know that she doesn’t have to worry about Mommy not coming. To me, her cry means “Mommy, I really need you to hold me now”, if I left her to cry, I would feel like I’m failing her, in a sense. Even if she doesn’t need to eat, doesn’t need a diaper change, doesn’t need to burp, or anything of the like… I will hold her close, talk to her, sing to her, etc. just to let her know that I’m there. The only time I “agree” with the CIO method is if you’re at your wits-end and feel like you would do something irrational if you heard your baby cry anymore. Just long enough to take a few deep breaths and relax.

]]> By: Melissa S http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method/comment-page-1#comment-4073 Melissa S Mon, 01 Feb 2010 18:54:39 +0000 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method#comment-4073 Depends on how old the baby is. Also -- depends on if they're tired or not. Sometimes when a baby is really overtired, it's hard for them to fall asleep. it's better to pick them up and sooth them (especially when they're under 6 months) -- otherwise they'll just cry & cry. Often the reason a baby cries in his/her crib is because they're not tired at all. in that case, I pick my baby up, play with her and try again in 30 minutes (she's 7 months). I HAVE let my baby cry -- I've done it when I know she's tired, when her cry is a fussy/whiny/tired cry, and when I know that picking her up and soothing her will not help her sleep. I think we're the best judges of our own babies -- so my response always always always depends on my baby's needs and mood. I do think that one of the most important things you can do is teach your baby good sleep habits -- and that starts early (3 months). Give them an opportunity to fuss and fall asleep on they're own. Don't be so quick to go in and "rescue" them. That's what I've done and my baby is a great sleeper. My friends always marvel at how "lucky" i am, but, I don't think it's luck. Depends on how old the baby is. Also — depends on if they’re tired or not. Sometimes when a baby is really overtired, it’s hard for them to fall asleep. it’s better to pick them up and sooth them (especially when they’re under 6 months) — otherwise they’ll just cry & cry. Often the reason a baby cries in his/her crib is because they’re not tired at all. in that case, I pick my baby up, play with her and try again in 30 minutes (she’s 7 months). I HAVE let my baby cry — I’ve done it when I know she’s tired, when her cry is a fussy/whiny/tired cry, and when I know that picking her up and soothing her will not help her sleep. I think we’re the best judges of our own babies — so my response always always always depends on my baby’s needs and mood.

I do think that one of the most important things you can do is teach your baby good sleep habits — and that starts early (3 months). Give them an opportunity to fuss and fall asleep on they’re own. Don’t be so quick to go in and “rescue” them. That’s what I’ve done and my baby is a great sleeper. My friends always marvel at how “lucky” i am, but, I don’t think it’s luck.

]]> By: »Spence's Mommy« http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method/comment-page-1#comment-4072 »Spence's Mommy« Mon, 01 Feb 2010 18:41:30 +0000 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method#comment-4072 letting an infant cry it out is mean and neglectful. letting an infant cry it out is mean and neglectful.

]]> By: preemie mommy http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method/comment-page-1#comment-4071 preemie mommy Mon, 01 Feb 2010 17:58:32 +0000 http://thepregnantnews.com/emotions/whats-your-opinion-on-the-cry-it-out-method#comment-4071 I do believe in the cry it out method. (I know I'm about to get a lot of thumbs down for this one) I believe co-sleeping is fine when they are newborns but I think that after 6 months or so it's time to let them learn that they have to sleep on there own and I'm sorry I don't care how many people out there say that co-sleeping doesn't become a bad habit because it does. Every single mom I know that has co-slept with there baby has had a very hard time getting them to sleep through the night when the time came to go into there own bed. I do not want a 3 old still sleeping with me every night. When I put my daughter to bed she's fed, changed, burped and I cuddle her for a little bit and I put her to bed when I know she's tired (yawning, rubbing her eyes) and usually she'll fall right asleep, if she doesn't fall right asleep she usually crys for about 2 mins and then goes to sleep until about 9am the next morning. If she crys for more then 5-10 mins I'll go in and get her and cuddle her some more and maybe feed her another ounce of her bottle and then try again and then she always goes to sleep after that. It works for her and me so I don't see the problem and she loves me just the same the next morning. I know what works for me, may not work for another mom but like I said it works for us, so that's all that matters I do believe in the cry it out method. (I know I’m about to get a lot of thumbs down for this one) I believe co-sleeping is fine when they are newborns but I think that after 6 months or so it’s time to let them learn that they have to sleep on there own and I’m sorry I don’t care how many people out there say that co-sleeping doesn’t become a bad habit because it does. Every single mom I know that has co-slept with there baby has had a very hard time getting them to sleep through the night when the time came to go into there own bed. I do not want a 3 old still sleeping with me every night.

When I put my daughter to bed she’s fed, changed, burped and I cuddle her for a little bit and I put her to bed when I know she’s tired (yawning, rubbing her eyes) and usually she’ll fall right asleep, if she doesn’t fall right asleep she usually crys for about 2 mins and then goes to sleep until about 9am the next morning. If she crys for more then 5-10 mins I’ll go in and get her and cuddle her some more and maybe feed her another ounce of her bottle and then try again and then she always goes to sleep after that. It works for her and me so I don’t see the problem and she loves me just the same the next morning. I know what works for me, may not work for another mom but like I said it works for us, so that’s all that matters

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