POLL: How would you feel if your husband was the stay at home Dad?
ByHere’s the deal:
I make more but he has the potential to do very well. I would LOVE to be the stay at home mommy BUT we can’t afford it. We may be okay if he stays home and maybe starts a side business but makes our son and house the priority. We would have to cut back on a lot but I am fine with that (basically two DINKS became parents).
Also, I work from home so there would be more between work family time (i.e, lunches in the park together, etc.).
Anyhow, I just thought I would throw this out here – men/women please comment about your reservations and pro-thoughts.
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12 Comments
January 30th, 2010 at 10:04 am
i think it’s a wonderful idea. i don’t think it matters WHICH parent stays home. i think whenever a parent stays home it benefits the child no matter what, even despite the gender of the parent. i don’t know why some dad’s catch crap for staying home, at least someone is there taking care of the child. and especially if it will save you money in the long run (like not having to PAY for child care) then i think it would be a good situation.
January 30th, 2010 at 10:15 am
ok im a guy so i might be able to answer this for you.
ok basically i could not stay at home all day.
there is no way in hell
its not that i believe that its a womens job
but i just couldn do it
i’d find a way to start my own business from home if i had to stay tho
i’d find a way to make money
im really all about makin money so thats just me
January 30th, 2010 at 11:13 am
i don’t see what difference it makes to your family who stays at home but it might make a difference to your relationship if you begin to resent your other half for the bond he may Develop with your child or the free time he is “perceived” to have.
the fact That you WANT to stay at home and be a full time mother and that you are going to work from home means that the fact you can’t do what u want to do will be in your face the whole time.
i guess its whether you can deal with it or not?
January 30th, 2010 at 11:14 am
While I know that it would never work for our family (my hubby doesn’t know how to work the washing machine, dresses our kids like tinkers, couldn’t boil an egg without destroying the kitchen, and forgets about silly little things for the kids… like lunch), my neighbours have that set-up and it works well for them.
She actually works from home, so stays holed up in the office most of the day. He watches their son, does the housework and cooks dinner. I think it’s great, and they all love how it works for them. No-one thinks less of him, most of the men we know have been in awe of him being able to do it, and do it well.
It doesn’t matter which parent stays home, if you have financially security, and your son is well cared for, then it works.
January 30th, 2010 at 12:08 pm
It wouldn’t matter so much to me. When my son was little before entering kindergarten, I stayed home with him and my husband worked and I also ran a small typing service from home for doctors/lawyers. Once my son was in school full time I saw no need to be at home if he wasn’t – so I went back to work as I could help my family better by working than being at home alone all day just housecleaning. I am a believer in a two income family these days. It’s not fair for only one to be trying to support a family. There is no reason for anyone to be home after the children are in school full time. Household chores should be shared when both are working. I think it’s good (if possible) if either the mom OR the dad can stay home with childern while they are small (prior to school) but doesn’t matter so much which one. That is pretty much my stance on things.
January 30th, 2010 at 12:49 pm
I don’t think there is anything wrong with it. It is a little bit out of the norm, since for centuries women have been sterotyped as the stay at home while the husband is the bread winner. I think it is great if a dad decides to stay home and take care of the house hold. I wish there were more fathers who decided to stay home, I think they would appreciate what their wives go through, no weekends off and no sick days. It’s like the song by LoneStar and the movie, Mr. Mom. Best of luck, to you and your hubby. He will need it!
January 30th, 2010 at 1:08 pm
My husband was a stay at home father for a while and he is a builder so he is a manly man lol….He loved it though and there is nothing wrong with it. I think so many times that men don’t get the relationship with their kid that the mother often does and a child needs that father figure a lot. My mom was a stay at home mother and my dad worked all the time so I didn’t get much time with my dad. I often wished he would stay home. But I think it is great that men are finally taking in that task.
January 30th, 2010 at 1:50 pm
My hubby isn’t a stay at home dad per say. However we work opposite shifts so he stays at home all day and I work all day. He’s the one who gets everyone up and dressed and off to school. He takes care of the lil one’s and does all the house stuff that needs done. I have to admit I was very surprised to learn what my hubby was ‘capable’ of. Men aren’t as unable as we think they are. My 20mo even is a daddy’s boy now!
January 30th, 2010 at 2:10 pm
My husband is a stay at home dad, and I’m the breadwinner. I, too, would love to be the SAHM, but he’s not really qualified to do anything that would make enough money to support our family of four. We have two boys, ages 3 and 5, whom he cares for, and he’s also a full time college student.
It has its plusses and minuses, honestly. It’s nice knowing that our kids are getting great care and aren’t stuck in a daycare center 10 hours per day, but on the other hand, my husband is INCREDIBLY lazy, and unless I b**ch and nag, NOTHING (except for laundry and occasionally vaccuming) gets done on a regular basis.
January 30th, 2010 at 2:47 pm
My wife and I discussed this in the past as well, and basically the way we saw it was whoever makes the most money goes to work, and the other stays home if necessary. Neither of us have a problem with it either way. I wouldn’t feel my masculinity was being challenged if she was the breadwinner (though it might push me to try and make more were that the case
) )
January 30th, 2010 at 2:58 pm
I am actually pondering the idea of having my boyfriend stay home after the baby is born, We would marry of course before he quit his job to make sure he has benefits but we just need to see if financially we can do it. I think the person who makes less of course should stay home. Depending on the man of course, I think this could be done. With mine, he would need a list of chores daily or a weekly schedule. Our children deserve to be with parents and not daycare’s. I think its a great idea, best of luck to you.
January 30th, 2010 at 3:25 pm
My hubby was a stay at home dad for our kids for five years. I’ve had two women bosses as well whose hubbies were stay at home dad’s.
It worked really great for us! If your hubby is OK with it, then go for it! My husband works casual now at two different jobs and is home when the kids get home from school and he’s also around to take care of home maintenance and looking after the cars and the shopping. He’s learned how to fold clothes – but that’s quite often MY job when I get home.